Some of the best spiritual guides are those who listen well. A care giver who can hear the heart and mind of someone can give wise feedback to help solve personal problems. Often when we seek feedback we use the term “sounding board.”
Interestingly the sounding board was a structure placed over a pulpit or podium to gather and project the voice of the speaker. Pictured here is the sounding board over the elevated pulpit in St. Mary’s Church in Oxford. It was from this pulpit that C. S. Lewis delivered his famous sermon “The Weight of Glory.”
Later on in his life C. S. Lewis acquired a personal sounding board which helped him in his writing process. The person was Joy Gresham who would become his wife and literary muse. Joy herself was an award winning writer and had a special ability in giving feedback to Lewis as he explored different writing projects.
For years Lewis had wanted to write a book on the ancient story of Cupid and Psyche but the words never came. Then when Joy came into his life she provided him with suggestions and encouragement so he completed this project in record time. The book was published under the name Till We Have Faces.
Also, because of Joy’s Jewish background and deep Christian faith her insights on the Old Testament helped Lewis in writing his wonderful Reflections on the Psalms.
Listening is an invaluable component of wise counsel. In ancient Israel King Solomon is remembered for his great wisdom. Often it was reflected in the priority he set upon listening before giving feedback. Let’s review the familiar story of his presiding over competing claims between two mothers. Although Solomon’s command is startling it reflects a keen insight into the true nature of a mother’s love for her child.
16 Then two prostitutes came to the king and stood before him. 17 The one woman said, “Oh, my lord, this woman and I live in the same house, and I gave birth to a child while she was in the house. 18 Then on the third day after I gave birth, this woman also gave birth. And we were alone. There was no one else with us in the house; only we two were in the house. 19 And this woman’s son died in the night, because she lay on him. 20 And she arose at midnight and took my son from beside me, while your servant slept, and laid him at her breast, and laid her dead son at my breast. 21 When I rose in the morning to nurse my child, behold, he was dead. But when I looked at him closely in the morning, behold, he was not the child that I had borne.” 22 But the other woman said, “No, the living child is mine, and the dead child is yours.” The first said, “No, the dead child is yours, and the living child is mine.” Thus they spoke before the king.
23 Then the king said, “The one says, ‘This is my son that is alive, and your son is dead’; and the other says, ‘No; but your son is dead, and my son is the living one.’” 24 And the king said, “Bring me a sword.” So a sword was brought before the king. 25 And the king said, “Divide the living child in two, and give half to the one and half to the other.” 26 Then the woman whose son was alive said to the king, because her heart yearned for her son, “Oh, my lord, give her the living child, and by no means put him to death.” But the other said, “He shall be neither mine nor yours; divide him.” 27 Then the king answered and said, “Give the living child to the first woman, and by no means put him to death; she is his mother.” 28 And all Israel heard of the judgment that the king had rendered, and they stood in awe of the king, because they perceived that the wisdom of God was in him to do justice. (1 Kings 3:16-28 ESV)
Solomon also wrote many of the Proverbs now contained in the Old Testament. Read how these Proverbs place a high value on listening.
The way of a fool is right in his own eyes, but a wise man listens to advice. (Proverbs 12:15)
If one gives an answer before he hears, it is his folly and shame (Proverbs 18:13).
Making your ear attentive to wisdom and inclining your heart to understanding; (Proverbs 2:2)
A fool takes no pleasure in understanding, but only in expressing his opinion. (Proverbs 18:2)
The value of really hearing the heart and mind of another is central to effective mentoring. How has the listening ear of a mentor helped serve you as a sounding board?